“To eat is a necessity, but to eat intelligently is an art”
Francois de la Rochefoucauld

Vitality!

I have a Vitality Card.
This little card gets me into movies for half price, gives me special savings at gym as well as flight savings. I am sorry that I’m not allowed to drive because it also gives me fuel savings. It is a wonderful little card and it requires that you stay healthy. Once a year you are meant to go for your Vitality Check Up.

My friend, B and I had gone for our first Vitality Check Up two years ago. This included a cholesterol check up. B’s cholesterol level was 5.3 whereas mine was a mere 5.1. B was warned not to let it get any higher. I practically danced out of the chemist that day. This was one area where I was stronger than B – cholesterol!

B had been told that eating porridge in the morning was a sure way to keep your cholesterol down. Yuck, porridge reminded me of that watery mush we used to eat at boarding school. So B now indulged in Jungle Oats each morning and Yours Truly gave a cheer for her low cholesterol! It was yoghurt for me. If I remembered. Every morning, we would go up to Ground Control. There they not only have the best cafe latte and cappuccino, but they also have my delight of delights – carrot cake! 

My Vitality Card caught my eye languishing in my purse. Oh uh, B and I were at least eighteen months late on our check up.
“Hey, yes, I’d forgotten about that. Let’s go now,” B replied.
I wasn’t all that keen. I certainly hadn’t been eating porridge and I knew my diet had not exactly been up to scratch. I followed B into the chemist. She went first.
“Your cholesterol is 5.1”, she was told. “That’s fine.”
It was my turn.
The woman in the chemist looked at my results and said: “I’m afraid you’ll need to see a doctor, ma’am, your results read: 7.6”
“Seven point…six?” I said in a trembling voice.
I was sent to the PathCare Lab where they could give me a more precise reading.
It was worse: 8.5!

No more Lindt Milk White Chocolate! No more cream on my bananas! No more cream in my Nescafé White Chocolate drink! Noooooooo! I couldn’t survive without my beautiful Parmelat Cream and my Nescafé Chocolate drink. When I woke after my afternoon rest, I rejoiced in making myself that mug of deliciousness. I would lavishly pour in cream along with the chocolate powder and milk with relish. Then in the microwave I would avidly watch the cream rise. It would ascend to the top of the mug and I would switch off the microwave. The drinking was a complete pleasure. I was a total master at such a craft!  Now I had to give up all cream! I felt like putting my head back and letting out a loud wolf’s howl that would have caused the rest of the wolf pack to creep away in shame!

I reflected on my eating habits. For the past year I hadn’t been eating at all healthily. Forget about three meals a day. I would begin my day in Ground Control demolishing their carrot cake. Often I wouldn’t eat much else during the day. Nothing except a slab of totally delicious Lindt White Chocolate which would be devoured with gusto. Sometimes I would find that I had demolished two!!! Was it any wonder that I lacked enthusiasm following B into the chemist?
“Your eating habits are going to have to change Ms.Young!” said B.
She was right, oh glory, she was right!

I went shopping and do you know the first thing I bought? Porridge! Gaynor Young was planning to go back to her childhood and eat porridge. But I discovered this very pleasant box filled with  banana, strawberry, apple and caramel sachets of porridge. You simply pour boiling water over them and then if you want, fruit can be added. I bought raspberries, bananas and strawberries. The first morning I was a little apprehensive about this strawberry porridge I was preparing. But by the time I had added the hot water, stirred and thrown in a chopped up banana and a couple of raspberries, it actually looked remarkably tempting. Tentatively I took a mouthful…and smiled. This porridge banished all memories of boarding school moosh. What a delicious treat!
I also started eating three meals a day. This was not easy for me as my stomach had shrunk. This Gaynor of three meals a day and no cholesterol ploughed on.

In order to lower my cholesterol, the doctor prescribed statins. My sister, Liz, was staying with Mums over Christmas and I saw a lot of her and her family. Liz began to get a cold and sniffed and coughed horribly. They then left and I thought: ‘Uh oh, I think my throat is getting sore!’
My throat came right but I began to cough. Badly! 

My doctor put me on a course of antibiotics and strong cough medicine. I finished the antibiotics but my cough had not finished with me by a long shot. It was so frustrating because I would be fine until I began to talk. Then this hacking creature would attempt to mime what she wished to say. Not an easy thing to do because I had been told that when coughing, you shouldn’t cover your mouth with your hand. This is because you then spread germs by touching things. You have to cough into the crook of your arm. Apparently, this is far more healthy. It might be healthier but with a spastic right hand side, it is not always easy!

B went overseas to visit her Dad in January. I knew that she was treating him to three days in London. I was dying to find out how their trip to the Royal Opera House to see La Traviata had gone. We Skyped each other.
“Gaye, we are having a wonderful time!”
“Great!..(cough cough cough)…tell me..(cough cough cough cough) how was…(cough…cough..)”
“Your cough has got worse. You should be on antibiotics.”
“I need…(cough cough…) a lovely…swig…(cough cough cough…) of my gorgeous…cream!”
B was not impressed with my sense of humour!
“(Cough cough….) How was…La…(cough cough cough…)”
“How was London? Absolutely fabulous!
“(Cough cough…) How was…(cough cough cough cough…)”
“You need to be on antibiotics!”
I wanted to say – I am!
All I could manage was:”I…(cough cough cough cough cough…)”
“I have to run. Dad and I are going out to dinner. See you on Tuesday. And get some antibiotics!”
I was on frikking antibiotics!!!”

What was so incredibly strange was that I didn’t feel sick at all. I just had this hideous cough. And the cough seemed to have started about three weeks ago, when I began the statins. I opened Google and began perusing everything about the side effects of statins.
“If you develop a cough after taking statins, with no evidence of interstitial lung disease, then this will be resolved by ceasing the statin treatment.”
I stopped using the statins and the next day the unendurable coughing vanished!

Having no statins, it was suggested that I took Rychol, a homeopathic medication meant to reduce cholesterol. 

Last Friday, two months after my ‘disastrous’ diagnosis, I returned to the chemist and asked for another cholesterol test. The pharmacist took my blood, consulted her chart and looked up at me grinning: “4.5!”
I then sped off to PathCare and got a more precise reading of: 4.9.
I was ecstatic!

I have learned a very tough, difficult and vitally important lesson:
You must eat correctly!
You are what you eat. I often used to take a carton of cream and have a long, delicious swig. Those days are now over. I will now eat three meals a day, as most human beings do.

And, my delicious bowl of porridge will definitely continue!

The post It’s Vital! appeared first on 'ear 'ear! by Gaynor Young.

I used to have a great voice. It was clear, strong and true. (Hmmmm, okay, so modesty might not be one of my strong points, but with brain damage, one always tends to ‘say’ what one thinks!) I had always loved singing. In fact, singing was engrained into me. I loved music. Just as one gets hungry and eats, so too I opened my mouth and sang.

Then I had my “Plunge” and  consequently lost 60% eyesight, became brain damaged, spastic down my right hand side, totally deaf and as a result, my singing days are over. I am unable to sing in tune. I can’t explain the loss that is to me. I am no longer able to open my mouth and bring people pleasure. Which is not to say that I then cease to sing. Oh no, I still open my mouth and notes pour out. Often. It is just most unfortunate for the people who are in the vicinity! They are treated  to a very loud, hopelessly off key version of whatever music has taken my fancy!

In Church, even with my CI’s, I am unable to grasp the tune of any new songs, so for songs that are unfamiliar to me I just keep quiet and ponder the words that are being sung. But if I know the song, I launch into it with gusto, blasting out the tune in sheer off key abandon! God knows what my voice is like and He doesn’t mind! I apologise to my Mum standing next to me and the people in front of me in church. How they manage to keep singing and not gape in silent horror and fascination is beyond me!

But last Sunday an amazing thing occurred.

We sang four songs that I knew so I “blasted” them out with gusto. To open my mouth and sing is still a wonderful thing! After the church service Mum turned to me in the car park: “Do you realise that you sang in tune today? I waited for you to go off key but you didn’t. Gaynor, you sang in tune!”

“I sang in tune! Are you sure?” I looked at Mum’s smiling face and grinned.

I grinned the whole way home!

So to my audiologist, Jenny Perold and my CI surgeon, Dr Wagenfeld, indeed to the World, I say: “Maria Callus I am not. But thanks to my second Cochlear Implant, I am beginning to sing in tune once more!”

And I could improve as time moves on. Who knows?

Celine Dion – watch out!

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I was due to fly from Cape Town to England early in June. I travelled to Cape Town a week before my departure date so that I could spend time with my sister, Liz and family. The day before I left for Cape Town I spent, what felt like hours, sitting in a dentist’s chair undergoing root canal treatment. I have a low pain threshold as it is, so I was not a happy little camper. The dentist gave me Myprodol for the pain and said that by the time I flew to England I should once more be feeling fine.

On my second day with the Whites (Liz’s family) I called Liz into my room and showed her my body.

“It’s going yellow or am I imagining it?”

“You’re right you do have a yellow-ish tinge,” said Liz, “how are you feeling?”

“Fine. Totally fine. Let’s forget it and go shopping.”

That night we were having dinner with friends and when Okie, a man with a medical background, heard that I was on Myprodol, he said warningly: “Maybe you should have your yellowness checked out, Gaynor. Myprodol has been known to spark off Jaundice.”

Jaundice, oh glory, just what I needed! Would they let a person with jaundice fly overseas? Liz was not taking any chances and booked for me to see the doctor immediately. The next morning I had a shower and while rubbing myself with my body cream, I thought: “Oh hell, I am definitely looking yellow. Please, please don’t let the Doctor say I’ve got jaundice, please.”

I explained to the Doctor what the problem was and she asked me to lift up my shirt where she was met by my yellow stomach and two smiling yellow breasts!

“Hmmm….” was her response.

“And look at my legs!”

My two yellow stumps were duly displayed in all their glory.

“Let me have a look at your eyes and ears….No, they seem perfectly alright. Come and lie down so I can palpate your stomach.”

I lay down and the palpitations began. Everything was okay until she hit one spot and I gave a little yelp. “That was your liver. Gaynor, I am going to take blood and then send it off to be checked. I know that you are due to fly to England in four days so I will mark it urgent.”

A day later she phoned and spoke to Liz with the results.

“Everything is totally normal,” she said in exasperation. You say that she is on Myprodol. Any other medication?

“Just the tablets that she has taken daily for the past seven years.”

“Well, is she using any new lotions?”

Liz repeated the question to me and I said: “I’m only using what I always use, my normal body lotion.” I held it out to Liz. She took the bottle, looked and it, looked at it again and said into the phone: “It’s alright, Doctor, I see the problem. Thankyou for your help.”

She turned to me and said in an exaggeratedly controlled voice: “Gaynor, what does this say? Read it out aloud. What does it say?” And she pointed to words underneath the products name.

“It says…oh…er,…oohhh…it says…Self Tanning Lotion,” I said in a small voice. “Well, I didn’t see that. I thought it was just my normal stuff, only…only in a different colour. I didn’t see….”

My sister brandished the bottle an inch away from my nose. “You didn’t see!!! Use your damn eyes! Self tanning lotion! Use your forty percent eyesight! Read it aloud one more time: Self Tanning Lotion!

I was not to live down my yellow jaundice for a long, long time.

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